I'm at a stage in my life

where I've anticipated something for about a month. Today I finally get it and I s t i l l don't know how to go about it. My standpoint is

what if it's not what I want to hear?
more dangerously- what if it's exactly what I want to hear?

Those are really the only two factors that come to mind, but the possibilities are endless in my head. Rather than the two factors I've been thinking about this whole time, I'd rather just not know.

I've been treating it like a hot-potato. Picking it up and throwing it aside. I even got as far as opening it. Still haven't read it though. it's currently on my bed. We'll see how far I get tonight.

..